What If: Wolverine and Iron Man
by sagas.pen
Summary: What if Logan and Tony Stark hooked up? Series of fics based on a pairing most people wouldn't even think of. Warning: slash ahoy!
1. Teammates

So, explanation time: A friend of mine and I play Tony Stark and Logan, respectively, in an RPG. They ended up as drinking buddies, and then we started joking about shipping them together. We haven't done it in the game (and won't, Logan at least is already seeing someone), but I couldn't let the crack pairing go. There's already some good fic out there but not nearly enough, and I want to add to it.

This will end up as a series of fics, each based on a one or two word prompt. I'll be posting them as they are finished. At the moment I'm not planning on writing any actual sex (this being my first slash pairing and all) but if that happens I'll change the rating. As it stands it'll be high anyway for cursing and groping.

Enjoy!

* * *

**Teammates**

Logan thought Tony Stark was an arrogant prick, which is saying a lot coming from a man with an ego the size of a small planet. This whole Avengers thing had gone to his head since he'd been the first approached to join the initiative. Didn't help any he boasted a genius-level intelligence and numerous advanced degrees in engineering and physics, or that he was CEO and namesake of a billion-dollar international corporation. He was a pretty playboy who seemed more interested in boozing it up than in saving the world.

Tony wasn't sure what to think of the auxiliary member of the Avengers, brought in whenever his unique skills were required, those "skills" apparently being a nasty temper and the willingness to gut first and ask questions later. Tony grudgingly admitted the other man was good for infiltration when that tactic was necessary but the Canadian also had a disturbing capacity for violence and a serious lack of remorse in such cases. Couple that with an annoying tendency to grunt monosyllabically when spoken to and Tony was pretty sure the guy was just a dumb thug with a third-grade vocabulary.

So of course the two of them ended up having to work together closely on one particular case. Steve had brooked no arguments, saying their unique skills qualified them more than anyone else on the team, and were Cap any other man he likely would have told them to man up and quit their bitching; as it was he just told them to get moving.

"Yer makin' a lot o' noise there, Tin Man." Logan was leaned up against the building they were investigating.

Tony glared at him. Not that Logan could see it behind the armor, but he was glaring. Hard. "The armor's made with sound-dampeners, I'm not that loud. And it's _Iron_ Man." Did his voice sound petulant?

The Wolverine looked back at him. He thought Tony was whining but it was hard to tell with the mechanized voice from the suit. "To anyone else ya might be silent, but I ain't just anybody." He mostly just liked snarking at his teammate.

"For our purposes, then, I'm quiet enough. Shut up and figure out how we're getting inside, I had too much coffee earlier."

Logan bared his teeth in amusement. He wondered what Stark would look like doing the 'I gotta pee' dance while suited up. "Stick close to the shadows," he said as he slipped away, body crouched with one hand held in a fist with his wrist straight, should he find the need to pop his claws. He heard Tony muttering behind him but ignored it.

Jarvis was telling Tony everything he needed to know about his surroundings. What Logan picked up on with his senses, his suit told him: there was a warm body just inside the door they were passing by in favor of one further down that was unmanned, and the place was on high security.

"C'mon, super genius, gonna need ya to crack the code on this place."

"What, you can't just claw it up?" The look Logan gave him was mildly terrifying, all bared teeth and crazy eyes. "Okay, okay." He directed Jarvis to do his job, which only took moments but felt like an eternity.

Logan heard the pop of the lock releasing and pushed the door open smoothly, quietly, stepping into a dimly lit corridor. "Where we goin'?" he asked.

"Left," Tony replied after Jarvis gave him the answer. He had the blueprints uploaded to the AI and boldly walked in front of his teammate since he was the one with the map. He thought he heard Logan snigger and ignored it in favor of, oh, actually doing his job. They took the various turns together, Tony slightly in the lead, until they came to the room that held the data they'd been sent to retrieve. Jarvis had a slightly harder time breaking the code this time but it happened soon enough, at least for Tony.

Logan resisted the urge to growl impatiently. He hated missions like this where he had to rely on someone else, especially someone else's technology. He'd seen what the Iron Man armor could do, knew what Tony was capable of, and he trusted him insofar that they were on the same team. He heard the lock click and put his hand against the latch to open it, but a robotic hand on his arm stopped him.

"There are people in there," Tony said quietly.

"I know, I can smell 'em."

"This isn't a kill mission, Wolverine." He knew Logan was aware of that but there was something about the other man that bothered him.

"I know that, Stark. You wanna take that hand off me?" Logan glared at him until he complied. "I got gas bombs to take 'em out, won't affect either of us. I ain't a complete animal, bub."

Tony made a 'hmmm' noise but stepped aside. He watched Logan crack the door and roll the small containers across the floor, the occupants of the room too busy eating pizza and poking at keyboards to take notice before they were slumping over in their chairs. "You're up," Logan told him.

The download of the data and then the upload of the virus took ten minutes during which Logan paced around, sticking his head out in the hallway repeatedly.

"Could you stop that?" Tony asked. "It's three in the damn morning and they're on a skeleton crew, not to mention I can kind of see through walls and there's no one nearby." Jarvis made a comment about letting sleeping dogs lie and was ignored.

"Makin' ya nervous, boy?"

Tony snorted. "You just call me 'boy', Logan? You can't be that much older than me, you could be the older brother I would have devised a way to off by now."

"Ya don't know the half of it. Almost done there, Flyboy?"

"Must you keep calling me unimaginative nicknames? I know you've got a third-grade education but really, I've heard five-year-olds with better smack-talking skills." He checked the progress of the upload. "Yeah, done here. Now let's get out before someone catches us."

They'd have done just that if things had gone smoothly. Tony hated being shot at with a fiery passion even when bullets couldn't pierce his armor. He turned to see how Logan was doing and found him crouched over a body, blood barely visible on his uniform in the dark and more obvious on his hand and claws. There was another body a few feet away. "Ya wanna take care o' them?" Logan asked evenly, nodding back towards the men with the guns that were still alive.

"I don't kill people," Tony replied.

"Then blast the fuckin' ceiling and block 'em off so we can get outta here." It came out as a growl. Logan was glad for the armored mask, he didn't really want to see the horror on his face. It was part of his job, part of who he was, but he'd seen that look on his friends' faces before, seen them turn away from him for the things he needed to do that they couldn't handle. Why it should matter that Tony might look at him that way, he didn't know. They hadn't worked together for very long and he kind of hated the guy anyway.

Tony sighed and lifted his hand, activating the repulsor beam on the palm. The beam hit the ceiling and brought rubble down on the gunmen, spilling it onto the floor as he moved his hand to direct the beam until there was a sizable portion of debris between them. The gunmen fired again but most of the bullets went wide, or so Tony thought until Logan grunted in pain.

"Don't worry 'bout me," Logan growled, clutching his side as he grabbed Tony's arm and hauled him down the hallway to the exit. "It'll heal," he said when Tony stopped him a few blocks away. Logan stuck two fingers into one of the bullet holes in his uniform, ripping the material a little. "See?"

Tony did see but that didn't make seeing him get shot any easier. "Fine, you're fine, this is all fine. Let's get back to HQ." Before Logan could protest he'd grabbed him under the arms and activated the suit's flight mechanisms. He was pretty sure he could hear the other man cursing up a storm and found he didn't much care. They landed a short while later on the roof.

Logan extricated himself quickly, smacking Tony's hands away. "Coulda gotten back on my own."

"Right, 'cause I want Cap breathing down my neck wondering why I let you run off to a strip joint to unwind. No fucking thanks." Tony got his faceplate off, suddenly feeling the need to breathe fresh air instead of the filtered kind, to cool off his skin which always sweat inside the armor at least a little no matter what.

"What the hell is yer problem, pal?" Logan asked, following Tony inside.

"Oh, gee, I dunno. Could be the dead guys back at the facility." The rest of the headpiece came off next and he rolled his head, feeling joints pop in a satisfying manner. "No one was supposed to die."

Logan sneered at him, drawing on the anger from the pain that was now but a faint memory. "Guy's got a gun pointed at me I ain't gonna just let that pass."

"You've got metal on your bones, just punch them in the face and they'll go down. Throw them into a wall. Kick them! Just do anything but kill them!" He was almost angry enough to throw his helmet – almost. He'd never hear the end of it from Jarvis, though, and he didn't want to piss of the AI that controlled his home and his suit.

"What you don't seem to understand, Flyboy, is that this is what I do. Ya don't think Rogers knows that?" Logan stalked across the main room at the top of the building, a huge thing that housed a lot of the technology the team used, including the long table where meetings took place. He knew the argument would just keep going if he tried to walk away but he needed to get space between them. "He knew it might be necessary and for all he's a huge fucking Boy Scout he also knows the difference between fantasy and reality."

He stopped when there was about 20 feet between them. "And don't tell me you've never killed. I know what ya did to the Ten Rings camp after ya came home from bein' a POW."

Tony really, really did not like the sneer on Logan's face. "Don't you fucking dare compare that to this!" he shouted. "They were holding women and children hostage, killing the men, and those bastards were working with Stane. If I hadn't gone in there and done that it would have just kept happening." He was almost shaking with rage by this point, pointing a finger at Logan like that was going to somehow make his point for him.

"Justify it all ya want, pal, but the world doesn't work the way you seem to think it does. Sometimes people have to die in order to get things done. I deliberately didn't kill any of the eggheads in there and I only took out the gunmen who were a threat. How many people have you killed indirectly? I've seen you take down buildings, take out vehicles, just because ya didn't watch the life drain out o' their eyes that somehow makes ya better than me? Yer a fuckin' hypocrite, Stark."

Before Tony realized what he was doing he was striding across the room, heedless of the warning look on Logan's face, the one that said 'Come any closer and you won't like what happens.' "The difference is _I don't butcher people._"

Logan's hand shot out to grip the front of Tony's armor where the faceplate would have normally covered, jerking the shorter man close. "Say that again and you'll find out just how much of a butcher I am."

Tony felt his heart flutter, more terrified now than he had been earlier because he'd never been within a few inches of Wolverine close to a berserker rage, certainly not on the receiving end of it. He brought up his hand still encased in armor but was interrupted from blasting Logan by Cap entering the room.

"Let him go, Wolverine."

"Stay out o' this, Cap," Logan growled, never taking his eyes off Tony. "Ain't yer business."

Steve was in civilian clothes but still managed to look intimidating. "It's my business when we can hear the shouting down the hallway. And when you're manhandling your teammate like he's Victor Creed. Let him go and walk away."

Tony wasn't so proud that he didn't appreciate the intervention. He was quite literally staring death in the face but he was surprise to see something like grief cross Logan's face in a grimace before he let him go and stalked out of the room.

"I'd steer clear of him for awhile, Tony. Takes him some time to get himself back under control."

"Why the hell is he on the team, Steve? He's a fucking animal."

Cap sighed, rubbing a hand over his face and suddenly looking very tired. "You think he kills so easily, that it doesn't even faze him and doesn't take anything away from him. I've seen that man do things that would give you nightmares, above and beyond what you yourself have seen him do, and I've seen what it's done to him." He shook his head. "You're the smartest man I know, Tony, but you're awfully blind sometimes."

Tony watched him walk out, too, slumping against the wall. "What the fuck?" he quietly asked the room, as if it would answer. The last look on Logan's face coupled with what Cap had just told him combined to make him wonder if he really _was_ wrong about Logan. The man didn't exactly make out like he had hidden depths, what you saw was what you tended to get but for all Tony knew he kept a lot of dark things hidden, things he didn't share.

He shook himself and went downstairs a few floors where he could get his armor off easily, and he thanked God he didn't see Logan again.


	2. Friends

Notes: Follows "Teammate" chronologically. Yes, I'm futzing with other chronology and the space-time continuum by mentioning _Mallrats_. I don't care. It was amusing.

* * *

**Friends**

Tony had a bit of a drinking problem but at least he was good for a few laughs when he was blitzed. Even better when he crawled his shaky way up onto their table in the bar and starting singing along to "Free Bird" on the jukebox.

"Geddown from there, ya dumbass," Logan said, grabbing at Tony's ankles and actually missing when the drunk man moved out of the way. "Yer drawin' attention we don't need."

"Jus' 'cause Peter's a pansy doesn't mean I can't sing if I wanna," Tony drawled. He meant Peter Parker, and since the rest of the world knew who the Avengers were (and Spider-Man was the only one who hadn't revealed his alter-ego), it wouldn't be too hard to put two-and-two together when a bunch of the Avengers got together for beers.

"Thanks, Tony, I love you, too, man." Peter threw a handful of peanuts at him, catching Tony off guard and making him stumble so that he took a header off the table.

Logan caught him before he did too much damage, moving quickly enough to be a blur to Tony, who was having trouble following things correctly. "Sit down before ya hurt yerself, idiot," he said, pushing Tony back into his chair.

"Screw you, Mr. She-Thinks-My-Tractor's-Sexy. I'm havin' fun."

"How 'bout I don't and say I did. And what the hell did you just call me?"

"It's a country song," Clint Barton said. "Surprised you didn't know that one, bumpkin."

Logan raised an eyebrow. "Bub, I'm Canadian."

"Got rednecks up in Canada, too, eh?" Peter put in.

Tony snickered into his beer. He liked it when people poked fun at Logan, especially since Logan never really seemed to care.

"Shut up or I'll beat yer ass with my hockey stick," Logan shot back.

"Tha's a euph—eupha— other word for his dick," Tony offered helpfully.

Logan snorted. "Ya think about my hockey stick a lot, Flyboy?"

Tony grinned drunkenly. "Ya wave it around an awful lot, kinda hard not t' notice."

The Canadian smirked. "Gotta mark my territory, bub, or some princess like you thinks he owns the place."

"I _do_ own the place, hoser. Half expect ya t' start peeing on things one o' these days."

"This conversation is going to an uncomfortable place," Peter said, sliding his chair further away from the two of them.

"What, like the back of a Volkswagon?"

Tony spluttered, nearly choking on his beer. "Did you jus' make a Mallrats joke?"

Logan rolled his eyes. "Please, I do watch movies. Especially when some idiot makes a reference to me."

"So Tony's the one really hung up on super heroes' sex organs?" Clint asked.

"Apparently, you've seen how he is around Natasha an' Carol." Logan looked over at Tony who was now pillowing his head on his arms and appeared to be asleep. He poked him. "Stark."

"Five more minutes, Mom."

"Ah, hell. Stark's out." He looked at his watch. "I'll get 'im home, I guess."

Cap overheard and asked, "You sure, Logan? It's out of your way."

"Yeah, I'm sure. Got stuff to do in the mornin' and I don't wanna spoil yer fun." He grabbed Tony's arm and shook it. "C'mon, Princess, time to go home and get yer beauty rest."

Tony blinked up at him, eyes glazed over. "Wha...? Havin' fun, L'gan, wanna stay an' have fun."

"Ya passed out, Tin Man. I'll take ya home so yer robot friend can take care of ya." He hauled Tony to his feet, getting the shorter man's arm over his shoulder and his own arm around Tony's back. "See ya later," he said to the group, hearing the chorus of "thanks" and "see ya."

It was a strange position to be in, considering how they'd started out. Months ago Logan wouldn't have pissed on Tony had he been on fire but now he found he actually enjoyed the billionaire's company more than some of the X-Men (mostly just Scott). They still bickered like they hated each other but he had Tony's back and Tony had his and everything was fine. The blowup the night they'd gotten back from stealing the specs still came back to him from time to time and he wondered if Tony still thought of it.

He got him home in one piece to Stark's New York penthouse. Jarvis let him in with nary a complaint, actually thanking him for his generosity. The AI still kind of creeped him out, like having a real person around that you couldn't actually see, or smell. Jarvis also handled a lot of the things at Avengers HQ so Logan had more than enough interaction with the AI; he was just glad he didn't have to live with it.

"Where's the bathroom?" he asked when Tony started making 'I'm gonna puke' noises.

"Down the hall, first door on your left, sir," Jarvis replied in his smooth English accent. Guess all butlers were English, right?

"Thanks." Logan double-timed it, getting Tony in just seconds before it was too late. He grimaced and was grateful he didn't have to hold Tony's hair back like he would with a girl as he leaned against the door frame. "Ya alright, Stark?"

Tony mumbled something and threw up again, head bowed over the toilet. "I hate this part," he said once his stomach had emptied itself.

"Wouldn't happen if ya didn't get drunk so much."

"You try running a Fortune 500 company and we'll see if you don't develop a drinking problem." For all he'd been slurring earlier he sounded much more clear-minded now. He staggered to his feet and reached for the glass by the sink, running water so he could wash his mouth out. His face in the mirror was pale, his dark, bloodshot eyes standing out more than usual. "And it's only a problem if you need help."

"Oh, right, sure." Logan nodded like that made sense before rolling his eyes, watching as Tony reached into the medicine cabinet and pulled out mouthwash. "Whatever it is, Tony, it ain't worth drinkin' yerself to death over."

Tony stood up straight from spitting out a mouthful of cinnamon-flavored liquid . "Did you just call me Tony? Not Flyboy? Not Tin Man?"

Logan smirked. "Could call ya Princess again, if ya want."

Tony stared at him, wondering why it meant so much to him that Logan would actually use his name. He knew the nicknames were Logan's own version of affection, if that was even the right word for it; if he had a nickname for you, you meant something to him, Tony had picked up on that much. Of course, there were no other men that Logan ever called 'Princess,' and Tony had no clue what the hell that meant.

"No, that's okay. Just ... I didn't expect it."

Logan shrugged. "Gotta be serious sometimes, bub. Yer company really that much of a hassle?" He wasn't the insensitive clod most people assumed he was and if a buddy was hurting he could extend an ear to listen.

Tony nodded, pushing past him to head back into the spacious living room. He took off his leather jacket and tossed it onto the coffee table before flopping onto the couch. "The board's pressing for more control since I'm working with the Avengers more often, they think my head's not in the game, not on the company. My VP thinks I'm drinking too much, which yeah, he's right but I can still fucking do my job."

"But they don't like the publicity ya got from outin' yerself as Iron Man."

"Two years ago, they need to shut up already. Stock shot up at that point and I'm not going to let them tell me it hasn't stayed steady since then. Just because we're not making weapons anymore doesn't mean my name isn't still on the side of the damn building."

Logan sat down on the couch a few feet away, long legs sprawled in front of him and his arms crossed over his chest. "Isn't there some company wantin' to buy ya out?"

Tony made a sound that was very much like a growl. "Hammer Industries. They're still in weapons and the board wants me to accept it so that I can 'pursue other interests.'"

"Meanin' 'get bent and let them make more money.' Ya got a shitty job even if ya do have more money than God."

"Which isn't doing me much good at this point. The money I could get from selling the company is astronomical but it's _my_ company. It was my father's and I'm not selling it just to make some stuffed-shirts feel better about their stock portfolios."

Logan grinned at him. "That sounds like the Tony Stark I know. Fuck 'em, man, keep doin' yer job well and they'll have nothin' to bitch about."

Tony couldn't say why those words touched him. Some days he worried he was going crazy, some days he woke up in a cold sweat wondering if he'd fucked up taking Stark Industries in this direction, if he'd fucked up outing himself as Iron Man. Before Afghanistan he'd never lost a night of sleep, never had a second thought or misgiving about any part of his life. Back then he'd been called the Merchant of Death and he hadn't cared because he had money and cars and women and what the hell else could he have needed?

Waking up in that horrid cave with a car battery keeping him alive had made him re-evaluate everything. It had also nearly gotten him killed when Obadiah Stane decided he didn't like Tony's almost literal change of heart. He'd been different from that point on, more sure of himself but also a hell of a lot more haunted.

"Thanks," he said quietly, leaning forward so that his elbows rested on his knees. He looked down at his feet when he spoke. "For that, and for bringing me home. I know you and I didn't get off on the right foot and I'm grateful we haven't had to kill each other yet." He looked up finally, a small smile on his face, and he found Logan smiling back at him. It was definitely a moment.

"Wasn't for lack of tryin' on yer part, pal. Ya got a mouth on ya and I think ya like the sound o' yer own voice." It wasn't said in malice. Logan found Stark amusing more often than not.

Tony smirked. "Guilty as charged. What good is having such witty and intelligent thoughts if I can't share them? Gotta spread the love, brother."

"If ya call that love I sure as hell don't wanna see what happens when ya hate someone." Logan glanced at his watch and got to his feet. "I gotta get goin', Tony. Got a plane to catch in the mornin.'"

Tony rose as well. "Oh?"

"Goin' to Japan for a couple weeks. Spent some time there years ago and figured I'd visit again, see what's changed and what's still the same." See if the same ghosts, the same scents, still haunted the streets.

Tony noticed the change in humor but didn't poke fun at it like he usually would. "Hope you find what you're looking for."

"Thanks." He meant it. "See ya in a couple weeks, Stark. Don't get into too much trouble while I'm gone."

"Don't piss off the Yakuza while you're there."

Logan chuckled and waved as he left by the front door.

"That was certainly an interesting night." Tony shrugged to himself and headed downstairs.


	3. Fragile

Notes: Follows "Friends" chronologically.

* * *

**Fragile**

Tony wasn't a complete slouch when it came to hand-to-hand combat. While he'd never been interested in any athletic activities as a child or an adolescent, his presence on the Avengers required that he at least be familiar with how to handle himself in a fight that didn't involve his armor. It wasn't likely he'd ever be without the Iron Man suit but, just in case, he figured he was better safe than sorry.

Come to think of it, 'sorry' was really the best way to describe how well he held up against his teammates. It wasn't lack of skill so much as it was lack of strength and brute force. He could hold his own against a man his size but he was the smallest of the men. He frequently found himself up against Carol Danvers who seemed to take pity on his poor mortal body, she who had invincibility and super strength. She tended to pull her punches and it still felt like getting slammed in the face with a ton of bricks.

Tony's favorite opponents were of the holographic kind but Cap wanted them to practice on each other, stating that while you might get the right sensations from fighting hard-light creations, they didn't think like people.

His other favorite opponent was the punching bag: at least the most it would do was swing itself towards you a little and unless you were a geriatric you could get out of the way in time. So that's what he was doing that day, working up a sweat as he threw punches and kicks at the body-sized bag in some semblance of a fighting style, mostly moves he'd picked up in bar fights back in college when he'd gone out drinking with his buddies while still underaged. Being a super genius hadn't precluded wanting to have fun and it wasn't like he'd needed to study hard to come out top of his class (still younger than everyone else).

The repetitive motion was soothing in its own way, the tiny bursts of controlled pain not enough to convince him to stop. He'd wrapped both his hands and feet and as he landed a particularly hard blow he felt a bit of the tape on his left hand give way. He shook the hand out before pulling the tape off, molding it into a sticky ball that he tried in vain to throw into the trash can as it stuck to his fingers, finally managing to dislodge it. He reached for the roll of tape to wrap his knuckles again when Logan walked in.

"Afternoon," the mutant greeted. He was dressed in loose dark clothing that did absolutely nothing to disguise the fact that he looked half a step away from 'roid ragey. "You the only one around?"

Tony nodded, looking back down at what he was doing. "Everyone else is either away on business or being particularly lazy."

"Then why are you in here?" Logan teased, dropping down to stretch himself out.

"Oh, you wound me," Tony replied, clutching a hand against his chest in mock agony. "Truly, I think my heart may break."

"Even with that thing in yer chest? What's the point, then?"

Tony rolled his eyes. "Powering the Iron Man armor, keeping me from dying, little things like that. I should totally just turn the arc reactor off, it's so useless otherwise." He watched Logan from beneath his brows, pretending to be engrossed in making sure his knuckles were protected. He felt a strange fascination whenever the other man was in the room, couldn't seem to keep himself from noticing the confidence Logan wore like his own armor. He told himself it was just prey watching the predator and hoping not to be noticed but that didn't explain the way his breath caught sometimes when he was in close proximity to the mutant.

He wasn't above admitting that it was possible he was bisexual and all he was doing was admiring a really attractive guy but did that guy have to be the fucking Wolverine? Logan would laugh if he knew what went through Tony's head sometimes.

Though Logan didn't smack him down when he got drunk and started flirting with him. Sometimes he even seemed to be flirting back. What the hell did that mean?

"Ya dreamin' up some technological wonder?"

Tony looked up, blinked. When had Logan gotten back on his feet? "What?"

Logan chuckled. "Yer eyes went all distant and ya weren't respondin' to me, I just assumed ya were doing some weird math shit in yer head."

"Uh, yeah. Just thinking of something engineering related." _Oh please Christ don't let him know I'm lying. Bastard can smell that kind of thing, can't he?_ He looked back at his hands, found he hadn't done a smooth taping job. "Shit." He unraveled it, balled up the mess and discarded it before starting over.

"You wanna spar?" Logan asked.

"Do I look retarded?" Tony retorted. "I'd rather go up against Natasha, she's got ninja skills so at least I have an excuse for not keeping up."

Logan smirked. "You'd rather go up against a girl? C'mon, I won't hurt ya too badly. I know yer not as strong as me or Cap. Or Clint. Or --"

"I get the point, I'm a pansy without the suit." He ripped the last bit of tape with his teeth and smoothed it into place on the palm of his hand. "Why the hell not? Maybe if you beat me badly enough I can catch some sleep in the infirmary for a few days and people will leave me the hell alone."

"See, that's good, ya have somethin' to aspire to." They stepped into place on the sparring mats, facing each other across a ring. Logan wasted no time in attacking, feinting right but landing left. Tony saw it coming and realized the move had been telegraphed on purpose, Logan was actually going easy on him.

Tony huffed and swung at Logan, the move easily blocked so he kicked and that was blocked, too. So Logan could let him dodge blows but wouldn't let him land any, that was totally fair. It was almost more humiliating in a way. "C'mon, Wolverine, I'm not a fucking invalid. I won't crumble into fairy dust if you actually fight me."

The next thing he knew he was flat on his back staring up at the ceiling, the skin along his spine still smarting from the contact.

"Ya sure about that, bub?" Logan asked, standing over him. He offered Tony a hand and popped him back up onto his feet.

"The bad guys gonna take it easy on me?" Tony knew he was just inviting an ass kicking, knew it wasn't the smartest choice. He didn't wait for Logan to answer. It wouldn't gain him the element of surprise but he was getting irritated and he just didn't care.

He landed on his ass a few more times and kept getting back up, trying to ignore the fatigue starting to creep up on him. He got a few kicks in and was glad that Logan pulled his punches somewhat, he liked his jaw intact thankyouverymuch. He'd seen men take full-on punches from Wolverine and end up with broken bones and worse so he couldn't complain too much for the consideration.

Tony felt the tape on his right hand give way but kept going as he landed two punches in rapid succession on Logan's cheek. It had much the same effect as punching a brick wall, in that the blow didn't do any damage to Logan aside from breaking his skin and splitting Tony's knuckles. The brick wall would have just scraped him up a bit more.

Logan bared his teeth at him. "Nice shot, Princess."

Tony grinned fiercely at him but didn't reply, instead ducking a punch aimed at his own head. He went low and kicked out at Logan's legs, hit one just below the kneecap from the side. There was a sort of grinding noise that on a normal person likely would have been a pop as the knee dislocated. Logan grunted in pain but didn't go down. Tony's momentum landed him facedown before he rolled and came back up.

Logan dealt him a stinging slap across the face that made his ears ring and his eyes water.

"Fuck!" Tony cried out, smacking away another slap. "You fight like a girl now? Jesus."

"Nah, it's just funny." Logan backed away, barely winded. "Had enough?"

Tony nodded, rubbing his jaw with his left hand. "Yeah, yeah, gonna call this one on account of you playing slap without the tickle." He tended to say stupid things after getting smacked around.

Logan snickered at him. "Aw, ya feelin' neglected, Tony? Not gettin' enough action?"

"Not the kind I want, no." He looked down at his hands, at the blood splattered across the knuckles on his right hand. That was gonna be a bitch to heal, especially since he used his hands for every little thing in his life. He could just see them getting rapped on the inside of an engine and he cringed at the thought.

"You want some water?" Logan asked, walking across the room to the fridge at the back.

"Yeah." Tony slouched over to a bench and sat down, carefully unwrapping first his left hand and then his right, the latter taking a little longer as he tried to minimize the damage.

"Here." Logan sat down next to him, placing a bottle of water and the first aid kit down between them. "Lemme see it."

Tony glanced at him, eyebrow raised. "You gonna play doctor now?"

"Is every word outta yer mouth some kind o' innuendo?" Logan smirked at him again. "Just gimme yer hand, it's easier for me to do it."

Tony submitted to the other man's ministrations, surprised at the deft and gentle touch. He found himself staring at the movements of Logan's hands as he cleaned off the blood and applied antiseptic to it. "I ain't gonna blow on it," Logan said.

"Rather you blow something else." Tony bit his lip as soon as the words were out but he couldn't hold in the snigger. At least if he died now he'd leave a pretty corpse.

Logan looked up from what he was doing. "Either ya need to get laid, bad, or ya got sex on the brain all the time."

"How about a bit of both?" The last time he'd gotten all antsy just from someone touching something so innocuous he'd been 15 and it hadn't ended well. Not so suave with the ladies until he'd gotten older. "Between the company and the Avengers it's kind of hard to squeeze in any, ah, recreation."

"You poor thing, I didn't think ya knew how to function otherwise."

Tony looked at him indignantly. "Hey, I've changed in the last couple years. I'm down to one Playboy Bunny a month." Truthfully his bed had been empty for over a year now. Whatever he'd thought was happening with Pepper hadn't panned out, things got weird, and then in trying to escape everything going on in his life there'd been a string of women he didn't remember; not much different from his old life but his reasons for forgetting now were different. He'd woken up one day wondering what the fuck was going on and he'd been celibate since. The great Tony Stark was losing his touch.

Logan was looking back down at Tony's hand, dabbing antibiotic ointment over the cuts before wrapping them loosely in gauze. "You'll probably have it covered in motor oil before the day's done," he said, letting go. He hadn't commented on the Playboy Bunny bit.

"The only way I get my hands dirty anymore." Dammit, the innuendo just kept coming. He stuck his left hand over his face, groaning. "I'm gonna shut the hell up now before I dig myself a deeper hole."

The mutant sprawled his legs out, one hand up behind his head with the other holding his water bottle, the position of his body making the hem of his shirt ride up a little to reveal a lightly-furred, smoothly-muscled abdomen. "If I was sick o' hearin' it, you'd know." He didn't look at Tony, his eyes instead closed as he drank his water. "Yer strung tighter 'n Scott Summers even _with_ Emma Frost sharin' his bed."

Tony wasn't sure how to react to that, at least not the first part, so he let it go. Especially since he was having distinct difficulty keeping his eyes away from that patch of skin. "That's still a couple I have trouble imagining together. They both seem to have sticks up their asses but Emma at least is amusing when she's not insulting my lineage." Descended from Vikings, Tony was, but anything that didn't involve "royalty" or the words "old money" got an upturned nose from the White Queen.

Logan chuckled, finally opening his eyes after he tipped back the rest of the water, licking the drops off his lips. "At least you've got a pedigree, I'm just a big mutt with no clue who my daddy was." It was said with humor but Tony thought he saw some tightness around the eyes. "Apparently I also smell bad but I don't wear cologne so I guess I'm just not worth her time."

"I think you smell fine."

Those hazel eyes ticked to his, one eyebrow rose and Logan's nostrils flared. "I can tell, Tony. I didn't think you liked boys."

Oh. _Oh fuck shit fuck._ Tony felt himself flush a little and then he was laughing, unable to do anything else as he scratched the back of his head and looked sheepish. "You seen yourself in the mirror lately? Kind of hard not to be attracted to that." No point in not being honest. "You pretty much have a neon sign over your head that flashes 'Prime Specimen of Masculinity. Come and get it."

"I do, do I?" His lips quirked and Tony's eyes flickered to them for a second. "Don't see ya doin' anything about it."

"This is the part where I look like a deer caught in the headlights because --" Tony's retort was cut short as the bigger man moved quickly, one big hand hooking around the back of his neck as he kissed him. Tony's sound of surprise dissolved into a groan of need that hit him like a freight train. He reached for Logan and sank his hands into his hair, giving access when he felt Logan's tongue seeking entrance to his mouth and he groaned again, fighting to get closer, to be devoured by that kiss.

Logan growled quietly and nipped at Tony's lower lip a moment before he sank back inside. He was very much in control of the kiss which, at the moment, was fine. He was a really, really good kisser, savage but thorough and Tony could have sworn he tasted the cigars the man was so fond of.

Suddenly the mutant jerked and pulled away, wiping at his mouth with the back of his hands.

"What?" Tony asked. Shit, that hadn't ended well, and he was shaking like a leaf.

"We got company." He shot Tony a glance. "Not you, Princess, don't worry."

Tony couldn't help grinning, his heart still racing and his blood buzzing. Damn.

Clint Barton walked in followed by Peter Parker. "Hey guys," the archer said, raising a hand in friendly greeting.

"Get hurt, Tony?" Peter asked, eyeing the still-open first aid box between the two men on the bench.

Tony held up his bandaged hand. "Wolverine beat the crap out of me."

Clint snorted as he dropped his gym bag along the wall by the bench. "Not enough blood on the floor for that."

"He actually got a few punches in," Logan reported, getting to his feet. Apparently he had some kind of iron control over his body because there was no evidence of the arousal from just a minute before. Tony wasn't sure if he should be hurt or not but Logan smiled at him, a quirk of his mouth. "I just ain't got a mark to show for it."

Peter was stretching out now. "Up for another round?" he asked the mutant, clearly not referring to the man still on the bench.

Logan snorted. "Not today, man, I'm wiped. Tony wore me out."

Tony had the urge to giggle, a little unhinged at the comment but he coughed it down, drained his water and finally his body was telling him it was okay to stand again. "Do I get a gold star?" he asked, making his voice sound overly eager and he even bounced a little. He got an empty water bottle thrown at his head and then Logan was striding out. He waved to his teammates and followed, not too quickly but Logan wasn't walking fast so he caught up easily.

"About what happened back there --"

"Ya gonna make a big deal out of it?"

Tony stopped walking for a few steps, a little hurt by the comment. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Means I kissed ya, and if yer lookin' fer hearts and rainbows I ain't gonna give that to ya."

Tony snorted. Seriously? Did he have a sign over his head, too, one that said 'Hopeless Romantic'? "I was just wondering if things were gonna be weird now. You seem awfully quick to make sure I'm not looking for some kind of commitment, Logan. You got issues?"

That got a growl from the bigger man and Tony was suddenly reminded of the night up at the top of Avengers HQ and he wondered if he was going to be facing the Wolverine again. "I'm sayin' don't be lookin' for anything but sex."

"I wasn't even looking for that much, Logan, I didn't expect you to kiss me in the first place." He waved a hand in Logan's face and moved past him, annoyed now. "Whatever, lumberjack, I got places to be." Once again he was cut short, his forward motion stopped when Logan pushed him up against the wall. "Get the fuck off of me, Logan. You said yourself you're not looking for anything but sex and I'm not in the mood right now."

Logan bared his teeth in a snarl. "Yer a pain in the ass, Stark. I shouldn't try to get involved with you."

"Do or do not, there is no try." Yes, he was quoting Yoda, the geek ran deep in him. "You wanna give this a whirl, fine, but I really do have places to be. Remember that company I'm trying not to lose control of?" He'd been at HQ just to beat the shit out of the bag and take his mind off of it. "We can go have beers or something because I'm not much for the caveman thing where you drag me back to your lair and have your way with me."

He pushed Logan away, fully aware he'd been allowed to and it was hard not to be annoyed by that knowledge. "It's not a date."

"Fuck right it's not." Logan took a couple deep breaths, then nodded. "Fine. Yeah. Mickey's again?"

"The strip club? Yeah, okay." Tony nodded and began walking away, and when he got to the door he couldn't resist turning around and making a little gesture with his hand. He winked at Logan and said, "Call me." He could hear the growl down the next hallway.


	4. Lovers

So yeah, my expectations for not writing sex were destroyed, this popped into my head the other night and wouldn't go away until I wrote it.

This doesn't mark the first time they've had sex, it's just one encounter of many.

* * *

**Lovers**

It took a lot of alcohol for Logan to approach anything resembling even a buzz, but it was possible, and he did it whenever he could; Peter Parker's stag party seemed a damned good occasion for it, especially when Tony was the one providing transportation so everyone could enjoy themselves. Logan actually lost track of how many bars they'd hit and could only vaguely remember the lapdance he'd gotten at Mickey's though that memory was starting to come back to him as the booze began to wear off.

For his party, Tony actually hadn't ingested that much alcohol, a rarity for him. Getting plastered was really losing its appeal when he couldn't remember half of what he did anymore, experiencing full blackouts that lasted for hours. He was beginning to understand how his Canadian teammate/lover felt, not knowing what he'd done, but in his case he could put an end to it.

Clint Barton was the third to last one in the limo, more than happy to go home to his wife Bobbie, a perky, pretty blonde who sometimes fought alongside the Avengers as Mockingbird.

That left Logan and Tony. "Wanna just crash at my place?" the engineer asked.

"Yeah, don't make no sense drivin' back to Westchester at ..." Logan glanced at his watch. "Three in the fuckin' mornin'. Jesus."

Tony snorted, relayed the directions to the driver, and sat back on the leather seats. "For a while there I thought you were actually going to get up and do karaoke," he commented.

Logan squinted at him. "I ain't that drunk, bub. I don't think I _can_ get that drunk." He leaned his head back. "'Sides, what the fuck would I sing?"

"I was thinking 'Don't Stop Believing' by Journey, actually." It was damned near impossible to keep a straight face saying that, and when he closed his eyes to imagine it he was surprised to hear Logan's laughter. He was still learning the boundaries between them, what would make him growl with anger or chuckle, though it seemed more often of late to be the latter. Tony's jokes usually weren't malicious in nature.

"People would pay money to see that."

"Shit, I'd sell tickets." He opened his eyes to find Logan smirking at him.

"So long as I'd get half o' the profit," he replied. "I'd be the one makin' a fuckin' ass outta myself after all."

Tony's smile widened. "I could always pay you back in sexual favors."

Logan rolled his eyes. "Seriously, man, no one has sex on the brain like you do, even me." Not that he found himself complaining, anyone that could keep up with him was an asset in his eyes. "How long ya think it'll take to get back to yer penthouse?" he asked, pitching his voice low. The memory of that lapdance was tugging at his body.

"Twenty minutes, give or take. Why?" He saw Logan glance sidelong at the back of the driver's head, and a slow smile of understanding dawned on his face. He barely had time to press the button that put up the partition before the bigger man was on him, one hand fisted in the front of his shirt as he devoured his mouth. Sometimes their kisses were a slow burn, nips and licks that drove him absolutely insane, but other times, like this, he had no time to prepare himself. Either he fought back or went along with it, and sometimes it was a bit of both, a small and private war between them.

Tony found his legs pushed apart with Logan kneeling on the floorboards in front of him, Logan's hands reaching for his belt buckle. It always surprised Tony just how deft those hands could be despite their roughness, and he bit back a curse as they tugged down his zipper and reached inside to cup him. As always that touch was burning hot, a contrast against his cooler skin that he wasn't sure how he'd ever lived without.

The scent of Tony's arousal was quickly making Logan lose his mind and he growled approval when Tony shifted his hips so he could get better access. He freed him from the confines of his slacks and wrapped his hand around Tony's cock, slimmer than his own but longer, the same light color of the rest of his body and smooth against the calluses of his fingers.

"Never thought I'd find myself in this position," Tony said on a shuddering breath out. He'd always figured Logan for the dominant type.

"Why, 'cause I'm the one on my knees?" Logan looked up at him, a slightly dangerous look in his hazel eyes. "Seems to me sex is about give an' take, and the one who's got the power ain't always the one ya think it is." As if to prove his point he tightened his grip and made Tony writhe and gasp against the seat. It always did something to him, to see a man who prided himself on his image undone like this, at his mercy.

Tony couldn't resist the back and forth. "I'm in new territory here," he admitted, "it's hard not to look at it as one being dominant."

Logan snorted. "I ain't got specific memories o' this" -- and here he eased his grip just a little and pumped his hand -- "but body memory don't lie. I've done this before." He dipped his head and sucked the tip into his mouth, tasting salt and skin before he rose again. "How'm I doin' so far?"

Tony found it almost hard to meet the humor in his eyes, the intimacy that was growing between them. What was just supposed to be sex was evolving, changing, becoming something neither man was ready to discuss or even contemplate. "I might need another demonstration," he shot back.

The chuckle the bigger man gave turned into vibration as he took Tony's cock into his mouth, using his hand around the base to guide it, and there was something amazingly different about a masculine touch. Women could give amazing blowjobs but, not being in possession of a dick, they could only do so much. Tony thought his eyes were going to roll back into his head as he realized just how different it was, a matter of the right suction, the perfect touch, pressure in just the right spot ...

His hand dropped down to touch Logan's head without thought to how that would be received but he got no negative response so he let his fingers slide into that thick, wild hair, curve along the skull and tug when something felt particularly good. Logan removed his hand on one stroke up and the next he was taking more, more, until the full length of Tony was encased in wet heat and he felt Logan swallow.

Pleasure lit up Tony's spine at that fluttering around the head of his cock, strong enough his hips moved involuntarily to get deeper, and Logan shocked the hell out of him by making a _hmmm_ noise that made him cry out and throw his head back before the Canadian came back up for air.

"So _now_ how'm I doin'?" he asked, smugness clear in his voice. He resumed jerking Tony off in favor of leaning up and attacking the man's neck with his teeth.

"I may be spoiled on men forever," was Tony's forced reply. He nudged Logan's face so that he could kiss him, taste himself in his lover's mouth, another new experience with him he found he wanted to get used to. The kiss turned rough, demanding, Logan's hand around him mirroring it.

"Please," he heard himself beg.

Logan eased back, just a little, craving that tone in the other man's voice. Tony wasn't the type to plead for anything, ever, but his body was screaming for release and Logan knew it.

"Tell me," Logan demanded, nipping at his lip hard enough to bruise.

"Dammit, Logan!"

"I can keep ya like this all night." It was cruel and it was so fucking hot.

Tony writhed at that tone, that growl. "Make me cum," he said.

Logan wasted no time in dropping back down to resume the blowjob, deep-throating him again now that he was close. His fingers slid past Tony's balls to the tight skin behind, put pressure there but didn't enter, and it was enough that within five seconds Tony was cumming, head thrown back again and teeth gritted against it, a strangled cry escaping him. Logan swallowed rapidly, breathing through his nose, until he felt Tony's body go boneless.

He rose and zipped Tony back up and then sat down next to him, pulling the smaller man in against his body with something resembling intimacy.

Tony leaned against him, head lolling on Logan's shoulder as he basked in the afterglow and the warmth of his lover. "For a guy who can't remember doing that, you're really, really fucking good." He wanted to snuggle against him in post-coital bliss but refrained from it, not sure how it would be received; it was the same thought in his head afterwards, every time, though he wondered if the way Logan always pulled him close after was answer enough.

Logan snorted, turning his head away from the urge to kiss Tony's hair. "I think I said the same thing yer first time, too."

The limo was coming to a stop and both looked out the windows to find themselves in the underground parking garage of Tony's penthouse. The driver's bored voice informed them of same in case they were unaware, and as Tony moved away to get out, he felt himself pulled back for a moment.

"But I ain't finished with ya." Logan smirked at Tony's exasperated look and let him go. "Not by a long shot."


	5. We

_Tony and Logan have been a secret item long enough. Tony breaks the news to Pepper and Rhodey._

_#71 on my prompt table. I was in desperate need of fluff without even a whiff of angst. Trying something different with present tense. Unbetaed._

* * *

Tony stares at the phone in his hand, the one he's been staring at for 20 minutes now. He knows he needs to call his two best friends and he can't bring himself to do it.

It's so fucked up, he thinks, that he's never been shy about his multiple bed partners in the past, not that he ever told Pepper or Rhodey about them in specific. And the only relationship he's had before now was with Pep, anyway, so why the fuck would he call her or Rhodey then? They both already knew.

And it's not that he's ashamed of what he's got with Logan, it's just... well, it's different, that's all.

That and he thinks Rhodey might freak out a little since he's had a few run-ins with the Wolverine and kind of hates the guy.

And he should probably tell his friends before the gossip rags figure it out and blab it all over the place.

Pepper first because, even if things had ended between them, they still love each other. He's smart enough to know that, and cherish it.

He catches her in between meetings, picking at a bagel for her lunch.

"If you've done something stupid, Tony, I don't have time to spare," is the first thing out of her mouth. She looks harried but beautiful, professional and put-together. Even after sex she'd looked unruffled, which had always bothered him; _no one _should look anything but wrecked and/or sated after that.

It wasn't even an ego thing. It was just _weird_.

"Your faith in me is like a balm, Pep, truly. I don't know how I manage not talking to you every day anymore, there's a hole in my life, dear Pepper."

She huffs a laugh despite herself. "Then why don't you fix it, dear Tony?" she retorts. It's not malicious, it's just wordplay. He misses her something fierce suddenly.

And it's entirely possible that the lack of a spark of pain is due to why he's calling.

"As to that, uh, don't fall out of your chair or anything, and you're already sitting down so-"

"Tony," she interrupts, her tone a warning.

"I'm seeing someone."

One ginger eyebrow goes up. "How is that news? Is this something I'm going to see on TMZ tonight, Tony, I can't keep cleaning up your messes-"

Tony interrupts her now. "It's been almost two years since you, Pep, and there's been no one else, okay? Just, uh. One." He braces himself and says, "One guy."

Pepper blinks. "Do I know him?"

Tony tries very hard not to wince. "You met him at the Avengers Christmas party last year. Logan."

It takes her a few moments to parse that, to match names and faces and identities - "_Wolverine?_ You're sleeping with _the Wolverine_?" To her credit, she isn't completely flipping out. Just shocked. "I didn't even - I mean, I knew you were friends, but..."

He shrugs, shifting in his chair. "It kind of came out of nowhere, I figured it was just mutual gratification or whatever and then it just-"

She makes this soft, understanding sort of sound. "You love him. You're _in_love with him, that's - Tony, I'm so happy for you."

His first instinct is to deflect, deny, obfuscate. Tony Stark doesn't fall in love, he has a piece of tech where his heart should be, it's sex and it's...

So much more than that.

And they both know it because he's_ not_denying it.

"Have you told Rhodey yet?"

Tony shakes his head. "He's my next call, I wanted you to know first."

"And the others? The Avengers?"

"They might suspect something, but we've been keeping it to ourselves." He smiles, rueful. "I might be okay with the limelight but Logan is the antithesis of that. I haven't pushed." And that's a pretty damned good indication of how far gone Tony is, that he's concerned for his partner's comfort.

Pepper makes that sound again. "I don't know what else to say, Tony. You look so happy."

Now he's actually blushing, uncomfortable. He's not good with open affection, even if it's verbal.

"I've got to go, Tony, I've got a shareholders meeting in 15 minutes. I'll talk to you later, okay?"

"Sure thing, Pep. Love you." It doesn't hurt to say it, because it's true.

"Love you, too." Her face is gone, then, replaced with his usual desktop background of cars and motorcycles.

It takes him a couple tries to get Rhodey, this time on speakerphone but not video. Tony's given him access to most of the tech that he himself uses but Rhodey's still kind of a luddite.

"Hey, man, I was just thinking about you," his other best friend greets him.

"Ah, is that why my nose was itching?"

"If that were true, you'd never get any sleep. You're in the news like every five minutes."

"Only every five minutes?" Tony scoffs. "I'm slipping. You got a minute?"

Rhodey makes a noise completely unlike the one Pepper made. "You never ask if I have a minute. What'd you do now? Am I gonna have to make excuses for you to the military again?"

Tony reflects on the fact that he never actually calls just to talk, he's never been that kind of person. Even so, it stings a little, makes him feel like a burden. "Not unless 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' has been put back in place and now applies to civilians."

"I have no idea what that even means and I'm kind of afraid to ask. You're not dying again, are you?"

"Come on, don't be like that, baby, I only ever risk my life when Doom decides he wants to invade Manhattan for the millionth time. Like we haven't kicked his ass back to Latveria and then some." The only person he hates more than Reed Richards is Victor Von Doom, pretty much because the wacko has figured out how to combine magic with technology and that should be fucking impossible, Tony doesn't care that Doom's proved him wrong on pretty much every occasion the Avengers have gone up against him.

"I think he's got a crush on you," Rhodey teases. "Either that or you're willing to give him the time of day when Richards won't."

Tony's never been good at keeping secrets or at not blurting out the first words that pop into his head. "My, uh, boyfriend might take issue with that." He's grimacing as soon as the words are out of his mouth, and it's then he hears a chuckle behind him, nearly drowned out by the sound Rhodey is making that is something like a record scratch without the record.

Tony turns to find Logan leaning against the doorjamb, arms crossed over his chest, looking amused.

_"Boyfriend?"_Logan mouths, nearly in time with Rhodey screeching it over the phone.

"Tony, I swear to fucking God, if you are fucking with me they will never find the body. No one will even question me-"

"You don't even know who it is!" Tony protests, watching Logan lope towards the couch where he sprawls with his usual carelessness. The bastard is still laughing, too.

Rhodey makes a sound very much like a growl, then audibly gets himself under control. "This isn't exactly what I expected you to throw at me," he says, his voice oddly modulated. He's probably gone somewhere he won't be overheard. "I'm guessing it's serious or you wouldn't be calling me in the first place. Is it someone I know?"

Tony tries not to wince and fails, making Logan chuckle again. "It's, uh... Logan."

He's kind of glad he can't see Rhodey's face now or he'd be afraid his best friend was having a stroke. There's silence for about ten seconds before Rhodey speaks again. "And he hasn't killed you in your sleep yet?"

That sets Logan off again, laughing so hard he's clutching at his sides and almost falling off the couch. "Ain't for lack of tryin'," he gets out in between trying to breathe.

"He's there?" Rhodey asks. "Figured you'd call while you were alone."

Tony rolls his eyes. "He just showed up. It's one of his less-endearing habits." He's trying to glare at Logan and he's failing, based on Logan's smirk.

"I probably don't need to threaten you, Logan, but if you hurt him, they won't find your body, either."

"Rhodey, for fuck's sake! I'm right here!"

"Shut up, Tony." Logan and Rhodey say it at the same time, and then they're both laughing.

"No, no, this is not what's supposed to happen, you are not supposed to bond over the care and feeding of Tony Stark." Tony knows he sounds petulant but he can't help it, _this isn't fair_. He's halfway to stomping his feet and holding his breath.

"Get over yourself," Logan says, finally getting himself under control and sitting up. "And I'm more afraid of Pepper than you, Rhodes, sorry."

Rhodey snorts. "That's okay, I'm scared of her, too." There's another voice from his end, Rhodey's muffled response, and then he says, "I gotta go, Tony. You spring shit on my like this again and I will end you."

"Whatever." He sits there in pouting silence as Rhodey disconnects, refusing to look in Logan's direction.

"You're fuckin' ridiculous, Stark. You gonna come over here or do I hafta drag you?"

Tony lasts about a minute before he flops down on the couch, making Logan manhandle him into something resembling a one-armed hug.

"Sorry for comin' home in the middle of that."

Tony shrugs. "Needed to be done." It's difficult to stay cranky about it with that solid heat against his back, reassuring like so many things in his life aren't. He isn't sure when he began looking forward to that and finding it made him feel safe.

Logan swings his feet up onto the coffee table. "When you wanna tell the rest of the freak show?"

Another shrug. "I dunno, maybe we should just let them figure it out themselves." A snort. "Or we could just make out in the kitchen, it's not like they'd expect anything less from me."

"When was the last time you slept?" There's still amusement in Logan's voice, coupled with affection.

"You actually expect me to know?"

_"Twenty-two hours have elapsed since sir last slept,"_Jarvis helpfully provides.

"Traitor," Tony accuses, protesting when Logan shifts behind him, hauling him to his feet. "What are you doing?"

Logan huffs. "Draggin' your stupid ass to bed. And no" - he presses a hand over Tony's mouth - "not for that. At least not until you've had at least eight hours. I'll fuckin' tie you down if I have to."

"Kinky old man."

"I walked right into that one." He hauls Tony forward, capturing his mouth in a quick, searing kiss. "Eight hours. Then I'll do whatever the fuck I can to tire you out again just so you sleep some more."

Tony is more than okay with that plan.


End file.
